Kayaking 101

Was out kayaking with some friends and a butterfly came out on the water to say ‘hi’ to them.

It tried to come to me.

I have a phobia of butterflies.

I splashed at it and screamed “fight me”.

It flew back to my friends like: “man, leaving that peep alone – getting all DEFCON 1 up in there”.

What is a butterfly even doing out on a lake?

Update 2: Coffee

Dad just asked me if I knew what decaf coffee was. I said “not coffee”. He said “brown sadness water”.

He’s continuing to make jokes.

  • “There are two kinds of people in this world – people who drink coffee and sad people.”
  • “If you’re drinking your coffee and you get a pain in your eye, take the spoon out.”

    Dad said “I REFILLED THE COFFEE BECAUSE NO ONE EVER DOES” as he left just now. Even dads are dramatic.

    Update: Coffee

    Dad just walked in and was excited to get coffee – opened the cabinet and found the coffee jar empty (the same one with a single bean left in it). He started groaning and said “OH MY WOOOORD. THERE’S NO MORE COFFEE.” 

    He has now started another coffee bag.


    Went to make coffee for mom and myself this afternoon, but I wasn’t sure about finishing off dad’s special Sumatra blend because he might’ve wanted some later. Mom scooped out enough for us both and said: “There, I left him one bean.”

    I assumed she was joking.

    I was wrong.

    She left him one bean.